The Prophecy of Escapecraft - Y u so new post?

[Skunk_Giant]

Sorry bout not putting a post up. Been sick all weekend and today.

[RobipodSupreme]

[random980]

O_O

More?

[Invunarble]

Does this mean Skunk is the new Haxx?

"Hey guys, I'm seriously going to write some new PoE"
"Seriously, it'll come out soon"
"Stay tuned because I'm gonna have it done real soon!"
"I'm not joking! More PoE will be soon!"
"I'm obviously telling the truth!"
"It'll come out before Detox does! (Invun points to whoever understands what I'm referring to)"
"Seriously!"
"It's coming!"
"Quotation marks!"

[Skunk_Giant]

SRS GAIZ, IZ COMIN' SOON.
But seriously. It's coming soon.
<.<
>.>

[vallorn]

Valve time < Skunk_Giant Time.

[Invunarble]

See above in regards to skunk being the new haxx

[Skunk_Giant]

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRGGGGGH
EWTH[EWAI[TOT[IT

*ahem*

So I wrote this bigass super-massive post.

And my session expired.

And my browser didn't save it when I went back.

And it's gone.

And I just wanna cry.

[Sti_Jo_Lew]

You've had this happen before.... why don't you write in notepad then just copy it over?

[Skunk_Giant]

Because I'm an idiot.

[random980]

Sooooo...

When can we expect the next update oh benevolent, doofus prophet?

[Invunarble]

Uhh. Ahh.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH. ALL THE PRESSURE.

Sorry bout not putting a post up. Been sick all weekend and today.

Ah, who am I kidding, that kid wants cake.

SRS GAIZ, IZ COMIN' SOON.
But seriously. It's coming soon.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRGGGGGH
EWTH[EWAI[TOT[IT

[Sti_Jo_Lew]

You know you're late with a new post when you get beaten by haxx.

[Invunarble]

On a serious note, if people still want to see this continue, I can probably get a post up over the weekend.

Over the weekend = about 4 months?

Did not enough people want to see this continue or something?

[LS13]

Need... PoE...... *crawls into corner and rocks back and forth*

[minnerthecat]

Skunk's just waiting for the release of TNA for the next installment, right Skunk? >.>

[random980]

Skunko gave me parmesan to give yous all the next update abridged!

Spoiler! :

"I cun handle dis no moar!" sed Jub
"It wud be eesyr if escapcroft stop interferin" agred Nootch.

It wus setl'd, wif a nod to each othr dey delet win32 frm escapcroft servr, all wus lost, da current adventr endeded hear. Little did dey no, teh escapiaans had nother map in da werx anywy, lololololoololol.
A new beginnin, a nu story, a nu adventur,
Teh Nu Adventur!

DISCLAIMER; Not canon. May not have been with Skunk's permission or even knowledge. Any resemblance to actual events that happen in PoE is complete coincidence and warrants me (random980) 1 (one) huge "Called it!" upon realisation of said coincidence.

[minnerthecat]

Skunko gave me parmesan to give yous all the next update abridged!

Spoiler! :

"I cun handle dis no moar!" sed Jub
"It wud be eesyr if escapcroft stop interferin" agred Nootch.

It wus setl'd, wif a nod to each othr dey delet win32 frm escapcroft servr, all wus lost, da current adventr endeded hear. Little did dey no, teh escapiaans had nother map in da werx anywy, lololololoololol.
A new beginnin, a nu story, a nu adventur,
Teh Nu Adventur!

DISCLAIMER; Not canon. May not have been with Skunk's permission or even knowledge. Any resemblance to actual events that happen in PoE is complete coincidence and warrants me (random980) 1 (one) huge "Called it!" upon realisation of said coincidence.

A truly magnificent instalment to the series, I can't wait for the next one! I especially liked how brilliantly TNA was worked into the storyline.

[Invunarble]

Skunko y u no give more parmesan to write next update?

[Skunk_Giant]

So uh... It's my birthday in 2 hours, and I thought I might come check out Escapecraft. Then I saw this and felt guilty.

[Invunarble]

[Angry mob of PoE fans intensifies]

[Iron_Fang]

Happy Birthday Skunk :3

[minnerthecat]

Happy birthday Skunk!

[LS13]

Much happiness is wished upon you on this anniversary of your birth

[minnerthecat]

Dang, I was thinking that would lead to a PoE update for sure!

[RobipodSupreme]

[minnerthecat]

84? The amount of years it's been is over 9000!!

[Skunk_Giant]

The All-New Prophecy of Escapecraft!
With 99% less extremely long absences!*
Lack of extremely long absences not confirmed. Any extremely long absences are possible and likely, and Skunk cannot be held accountable for his own laziness/forgetfulness/etc.

What's that, you say? You've forgotten everything that happened? You're new? You don't want to go back and read every single post?
Well fortunately for you, The All-New Prophecy of Escapecraft is here to bring you up to speed fast!
While everything that has previously happened IS canon, this post right here will forever serve as a starting point. I guess kind of in the way that Doctor Who with the ninth Doc served as a starting point, whilst still acknowledging the other 30 thousand seasons.
What does this mean in simple terms?
New Characters!
I've been away from the community for a while (sorry!), so I'm not sure who's still here or interested in PoE anymore. Not to mention, there may be some new people who are interested in something like this. As a result, I'm gonna look at resetting all the characters. SOME characters will have to come back, as they still have important plot threads that need to continue. If you've previously featured on PoE and want to return for more, by all means, let me know and I'll write you in. If you're new and what in, the same applies.

New (and continuing) stories!
I plan to make this reboot accessible to anyone who's new or has forgotten what's happened in PoE, so most plot threads will be new.
That said, some will continue (though with clear explanation). Any big twists I had planned (or did I?) are still in play, so while you won't need to have read anything previous to this to understand the story, anything that you older readers picked up on when initially reading still applies.

So, without further ado...

--------------------------------------------

The Prophet's eyes snapped open. Voices. He could hear them outside. How long had he been asleep?
"It's starting again!" a voice echoed in the distance.
The Prophet looked around, but could see no one.
"We don't have much time. We can't afford another halt!"
"Is he working? He has to start working again!"
"They're in!" a new voice called.
"If you can hear me..." The first voice suddenly sounded closer... Was it in the room with The Prophet? Was it talking to him? "You have to keep writing."

The Story So Far...
Long ago, the Empire of Escapia was a small, but peaceful one.
The lands of Genesis and Exitus were home to Escapians, led by their King, SneakyPie, and all was well, until the Griefers rose. The Great Notch responded to the growing Griefer threat by unleashing the 'Alpha' - otherwise known as 'Creatures' - inhuman beings that forced the people of Craftmine to work together to survive, not fight each other. Unprepared for such beings, the people of Escapians fled their homes and took to the seas, abandoning Genesis and Exitus and discovering new lands. There, they found Terra, and a new Escapian empire was formed, stronger than the first. With SneakyPie at the helm, and Lord Louis Mountbatten and the Great Wizard Wokka at his side, a Creature-proof Empire formed, growing more and more by the day.
But as Escapia and other Craftmine Empires grew more resilient, the threat of Griefers once again emerged. One night, with the people of Escapia distracted by an exciting meteor shower, the Griefers attacked in incredible numbers. Though the attack was held back, Sneaky saw that action needed to be taken to ensure Escapia's survival.

While trying to understand the Griefers, Louis Mountbatten interrogated the most dangerous Griefer in Escapian captivity, xXXMLGProzXXx, known by most as 'Proz'. Proz agreed to help Mountbatten on the condition that he retrieve the one item that Proz desired most. The tool of his demise - the VCLB (Very Clearly Labelled Bantrap). The VCLB which had long since been retired lay in an Escapian Museum, and Mountbatten knew there was no chance he would be given permission to buy Proz's help with the artifact. So he did what he had to for Escapia. Mountbatten stole the VCLB.
Mountbatten was stopped and publicly arrested, inevitably facing the branding of a traitor. King Sneaky, knowing that Mountbatten had acted in the good of the Empire, created an elaborate lie, explaining Mountbatten's actions, and in the process, resigning as King and putting Wokka and Mountbatten in charge.

At the same time, one of the Leaders - the powerful protectors and law-enforcers of Escapia - was kidnapped by Griefers. Their attacks became more frequent around Craftmine, decimating most Empires. With Sneaky's resignation and the ever-growing threat of Griefers, tensions rose. When the Griefers somehow acquired and used a Hackbot - an incredibly powerful tool thought to be a myth - to impersonate Escapian Leader Zinrius and order the razing of a citizen's town, Seahaven, rebellion broke out. At this point, Escapia was near-defenceless, with the majority of its navy and military overseas, after finding the locations of possible Griefer bases.
With small numbers, the Escapian loyalists were defeated by ReCUT rebels, led by King Sneaky himself.
Meanwhile, the Escapian navy encountered a group of 'Agents', led by an ex-Escapian known as Superglitch. Who Glitch answered to was unclear. The Agents appeared to be trying to quell the Creature infestations worldwide, even going as far as to bombard and burn down abandoned towns to avoid Creature habitation, including New Central - the capital of Exitus - as well as set off a nuclear bomb in a zombie-ridden town. Unbeknownst to the Escapians, the Agents have also been working with Notch in creating the 'Beta'. Exactly what the Beta is remains unknown.
Additionally on their journey, the navy encountered a man known as 'Walker' and his army. The group clearly held a rivalry with Glitch's Agents, and were spotted by a few Escapians collecting Creatures onto their ships. To what end, Walker refused to reveal.
Before returning to Escapia, the navy witnessed the Battle of Future, an abandoned Escapian town. During the battle, DaemonLee, an Escapian citizen, and Superglitch, among others were killed. Daemon by Creatures, Glitch by the infamous 'Collective' - a being of immense, unknown power, that few have encountered.

Returning to Escapia, the military and navy met up with the remaining Loyalists, who had used the Escapian Prison as a HQ. Blackadder, an Escapian Leader, rallied a group of ex-Leaders together, and with the support of Mountbatten, Wokka, and the Loyalist Army, launched an attack on ReCUT.
The Battle culminated with the Collective arriving, and causing mass damage around Escapia. It was only with Wokka and Mountbatten's combined power that the Collective was forced to retreat.
With the battle dying down, Invunarble, an Escapian Mentor, was murdered by Prisoner 697 - an ex-CUT Agent who had gone undercover at the order of Mountbatten long before the Civil War. Since his mission had been completed, 697 hadn't been heard of, and was presumed missing until now. Though once a loyal Escapian, 697 was now furious with CUT and Escapia. Leaving Inv to die, 697 used Leader powers (from where he received them, no one knows), to fight his way to Louis Mountbatten, but in his attempt to assassinate the head of CUT, 697 was foiled by Blackadder, who sacrificed his own life saving Mountbatten's.

Four days later, peace was reached when Sneaky handed control of the Empire back to Mountbatten and Wokka on the conditions he receive the role of Advisor and retain some power. Not expecting Sneaky to change much, Mountbatten and Wokka agreed, but were unhappy when Sneaky announced the Escapian Crusades, vowing to strike Griefers before they had the chance to strike first.

Now...
Months have passed. As disagreements between Advisor Sneaky and Escapian Rulers Wokka and Mountbatten arise, some are unsure if Escapia truly has seen the last of ReCUT. Walker's Men and Glitch's Agents still roam the seas, but to what end? Why is Sneaky so desperate to halt any plans of expanding the Escapian Prison, and what project is keeping Mountbatten busy at CUT?
The Escapian Volunteers have just returned from their Griefer crusades with no word of the kidnapped Milo. But what other news will they bring?

--------------------------------------------

What's that I hear you say? This is just repeating the same old crap you've already read? You want some NEW, ORIGINAL stuff? Well you can have it! Just post here that you're still interested in your character being used, so I know who to include as main characters from now on. Until then, here's a tiny post to keep you occupied.

------------------------------

Prologue

Everyone in the room stood as Mountbatten entered the room with Wokka and Sneaky.
"You may sit," Mountbatten said, taking his own seat at the head of the table. "Not you Derek, you don't have a seat. Get off the ground, give me my coffee and leave."
"Yessir," Derek muttered, rushing out of the room.
"You'll notice we have three distinguished guests with us today," he informed the CUT Executives. "Considering the urgency of the matter, I thought it important we all meet together. To my right and left, Sneaky and Wokka, respectively. You'll also notice TehBeard further down the table."
"What exactly IS the urgency of the situation, Mountbatten?" Sneaky asked.
Haxx, an Executive CUT member, chimed in. "You see Sneaky, as I'm sure you and the rest of the New Escapian Parliament have noticed, we're losing money. The already sparse resources of Craftmine simply aren't proving to be enough for all of our plans."
"Seems to me we're living in a golden age of luxury," Sneaky replied. "Stained glass windows. That's not necessary, that's luxury."
"We're looking at the bigger picture, Sneaky," Mountbatten responded. "We can't fund all of our projects. The prison expansion we've been developing over the past few months has taken a mere fraction out of our budget, but we're still running dry."
"We've done the numbers," Haxx continued, "and with all of our projects, including confidential CUT projects, we still should have cash to spare. So we're wondering where its been going. It's no secret you've been building something, Sneaky. We want to know how much you've spent, and what it's for."
Sneaky turned to Mountbatten. "This isn't a CUT matter. This is a matter between you, I, and Wokka."
"I have to agree with Sneaky here," Wokka said. "CUT is supposed to handle criminal matter."
"And who's to say this isn't criminal?" Mountbatten asked. "Sneaky, you've been spending Escapian money without any record of what it's going to."
"Public works," Sneaky replied.
"Then why have materials been travelling from the docks? From ships that have travelled to Tekland?" Mountbatten asked.
"So you HAVE been spying on me?" Sneaky asked.
"Sneaky, I'm asking one more time-"
"I'm leaving," Sneaky interrupted. "This isn't CUT business. Escapia is run by the New Escapian Parliament, not some spy agency. If you want to talk to me, you'll find me in my office," he said, slamming the door behind him.
Haxx broke the silence. "So what do we do?"
"Perhaps I should leave too," said Wokka. "This is CUT business, after all."
When Wokka had left, Mountbatten spoke. "I want Agents following him from now on," said Mountbatten. "If he's bringing resources in from Tekland, he's putting the whole Empire at risk. I don't want a nuclear bomb wiping us all out. Until we hear more from our spies, let's leave it at that."
The executives filed out, leaving just Haxx and Mountbatten.
"Sir, one more thing."
"Yes, Haxx?"
"It's Random and Minner. They're doing their little investigations again."
"Watch them. Don't do anything yet, but be ready to act. We can't have anymore secrets getting out."

[minnerthecat]

WOO! A new post! I would love to still be a part of this story if I may

[Skunk_Giant]

You may, good Sir! I was hoping you'd say that actually, because, as I'm sure you can tell from those last couple of lines, you still have a part to play.